Loneliness

Do you ever find yourself lonely? Physically, and spiritually? Over and over I have read comments and desperate pleas for advice from moms who find themselves struggling to cope with their current loneliness. The past year+ of shut downs and restrictions has amplified the isolation many of us are feeling, though I wonder how many were already familiar with loneliness.

Even before 2020, we may have had challenges of finding friends we “click” with. We may have struggled finding groups for our children to spend time with, or other moms we can talk to beyond a surface chit chat. And now, in our current upheaval of “normal,” we are seeing the Church being sifted and people choose whether or not they will hold fast to Scripture. I don’t know about you, but this has been the hardest part for me – seeing so many friends and acquaintances walk away from the Lord and embrace our culture’s wickedness. It’s heartbreaking, and while it doesn’t necessarily mean the end of friendships it does cause separation to one degree or another.

We can often find ourselves in seasons of loneliness. And it begs the question – what to do?

One morning I was reading 1 Kings and the chapters for the day were so fitting. Chapters 17-19 share some of Elijah’s life, and his work for the Lord. God used him to do miracles and save lives! He walked closely with the Lord and was obedient to Him. Yet he was lonely and hard-pressed, and finally begged God to just let him die. “It is enough!” he cried (19:4). “I have been very zealous for the Lord God of hosts; for the children of Israel have forsaken Your covenant, torn down Your altars, and killed Your prophets with the sword. I alone am left; and they seek to take my life” (19:10).

Who else but the Lord can refresh us? He took Elijah out of his cave, and showed Himself to him. He told him what was to come, and then reassured him: “Yet I have reserved seven thousand in Israel, all whose knees have now bowed to Baal, and every mouth that has not kissed him” (19:18). Elijah was not actually alone.

We need to remember this in regard to our own lives. We may feel lonely, and things can look bleak, but the Lord always saves a remnant. There are always other faithful believers who have not bowed to pagans, who will hold fast to Scripture and refuse to deny their Savior. They may not be in our neighborhoods, or even in our counties – but they exist, spread out where the Lord has placed them. We are in good company.

With that in mind, here are other actions I hope you will find helpful:

1. Read the Word and pray – We know this! Wallow not; be fed by His Word, then get up and do the next thing. Pray all day as you go about your tasks. You will find He is an ever present, close Companion.

2. Keep friendships in healthy perspective – The Lord is good to bring friends in due season. Sometimes those seasons don’t last long, sometimes they last decades. Sometimes friends overlap seasons, sometimes they don’t. Yet we can trust that He knows what He’s doing with us, and with our friends. Learn to cherish them but not hold them too closely. Friends are not our end-all; only He can satisfy as a Friend who knows us better than anyone else.

3. Get to know people – Holding friendships loosely doesn’t mean not having any at all, or not trying to build some! But instead of trying to find people that fit your criteria, work to get to know the people around you. Be a multi-generational friend, not an only-my-age friend. We learn from and can be edified by people of all ages and backgrounds. This may be a challenge right now, but I also encourage you to get together with people and build relationships. It’s a necessity! Go to church, get together with other believers to pray, host someone for dinner. Make it happen.

4. Journal – write everything out. I have kept a journal for close to two decades, and I can testify to how helpful it is. Putting all of your thoughts on paper can help you sort through them. Looking back may be cringy (it really is), but it is a testimony to God’s goodness for carrying you and growing you. It is a private space to pour your thoughts and emotions out to the Lord, and it brings maturity!

5. Read biographies of other Christians – there are so many! I recently finished Becoming Elisabeth Elliot by Ellen Vaughn; highly recommend it. A Chance to Die is another great one; it’s a biography about Amy Carmichael by Elisabeth Elliot. Read about Gladys Aylward, missionary to China. Read Found Faithful by Elizabeth Skoglund, a compilation of stories about Charles Spurgeon, CS Lewis, Amy Carmichael, Ruth Bell Graham, Andrew Murray, and others. Reading about others who have gone before us is so encouraging and inspiring. They will remind you of the greatness of our God and leave you knowing you’re not alone in this marathon of faith!

Ultimately, we know that our loneliness and challenges are temporary. We endure for a moment in the grand scheme of things. Our God is forever on His throne, and darkness cannot overcome His light.

Even in your loneliness, keep your eyes firmly fixed on His Word. There you will find satisfaction for your soul. May we be the remnant, and the remnant that multiplies.

Year-End Sentiments

“I’m not making any plans for 2021 - I want to see what I’m agreeing to first!”

Have you noticed there isn’t much goal-setting and resolution-making going on right now? What a strange year this has been! Many of us are looking at 2021 a little hesitant, not sure of what awaits us. Either that or we are frantically rushing forward to leave 2020 behind!

“Whatever I tell you in the dark, speak in the light; and what you hear in the ear, preach on the housetops. And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell. Are not two sparrows sold for a copper coin? And not one of them falls to the ground apart from your Father’s will. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.”
Matthew 10:27-31

Each time we have moved to a new place, there have been little brown sparrows. I’ve learned to look for them; sitting on the wire at one apartment, resting in the trees at another house, and now they perch all along our fence. They show up on their own, happily chirping without a care in the world. They are a constant reminder to me of how the Lord has cared for me and my family, regardless of what goes on around us!

I believe 2020 has been a good year, because the Lord ordained it. He saw fit to bring each day and its dealings. It has been a hard year, no doubt about that. But He has exposed darkness, He has shone light in even the corner shadows where evil has lurked unnoticed. He has shuffled our lives so that we - if we are paying attention - can see yet again how life is not in our control. He has been re-prioritizing many things for many people. Has it come without pain? Some of it, but not all of it. Yet He knows what He’s doing and He has cared for us.

If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, I hope you leave 2020 energized. Going forward, we have such opportunity to share the hope of the Gospel to a dying world! We are not able to go on in life just coasting along; we either believe in the Lord or we don’t. We will either stand for His truth or we won’t. It’s hard, but it’s simple.

These are good days, friends. These are days we get to show our children how to live for Christ. These are days we get to be even more purposeful in teaching them and training them in the way God lays out for us. Now is the time to be intentional with our marriages, to put our minds to work in our households, to know that what we are doing as wives and mothers is a holy calling.

This next year is unknown, just like any other year. It will likely be hard and refining. But praise God for the refinement, that we would know Him more and be better able to bring Him glory!

Keep your chin up, dear friends, as we go into this new year. We are not without hope! Be refreshed, knowing that the Lord has already numbered your days and He will not leave you for any one of them. He is always present; a very present help in time of trouble (Psalm 46:1) and always near you in pleasant times too.

Run the race the Lord has called you to. Spend your days immersed in His Word and in prayer, looking for ways to serve and bless others. We have good works ahead of us for His glory, let’s walk in them. A life spent wholly for the Lord is certainly not a life wasted!

“For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.”
Ephesians 2:10

***

“Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 3:12-14

Happy New Year!

- Amy

Friday Magnify - 4

“Oh, magnify the Lord with me,
And let us exalt His name together.”
Psalm 34:3

Happy Friday! I have been so struck this week with how merciful our God is. Often I complain and am discontent with things in life. Challenges can throw me for a loop and before I know it, I am an ungrateful little stinker! God gently reminds me that He has saved my soul. What is anything in light of that? He has given me all of my days and they are each a gift - complaining is being ungrateful, and I have nothing to be ungrateful for. He is always good and always merciful!

He even looks after the little details, like the above-pictured donut. I had thought earlier in the week about what a birthday cake would look like for a 10am party, and settled on a donut-type dessert being a good idea. Really didn’t want to do a drive-thru donut, since they don’t taste as good and usually upset everyone’s stomachs. But, I had no idea when I would make the 40-minute trip to our favorite donut place…and I wasn’t sure I wanted to make any…so I completely forgot about it. (This is typical, and I end up having to pull something out of thin air last-minute. Heh.)

Unrelated, Thursday I had a last-minute doctor appointment that seemed like a total waste of time. Drove an hour up to see a doctor for three minutes before being set back home. But, right down the road from the office is a fabulous donut shop. So we grabbed some donuts and drove home.

It wasn’t until I got home and settled that I realized I had the donut I needed for my little guy’s birthday. Even when we’re space cadets the Lord looks out for us! He obviously didn’t have to add this little detail to my life, but He did and I am thankful!

Has the Lord blessed you in creative ways this week?

Have a great weekend! :)

Amy

Ever Want to Be a Missionary? Here's Our Chance

Have you ever wanted to be a missionary?

I have. I thought I’d be a missionary elsewhere - specifically Belize, where I got the coins above - and I had a picture of what it would look like. The things I would spend my days doing, the boldness I would naturally have to tell everyone about Jesus (because becoming a missionary automatically means you’re bold, right? ;))

Maybe you’ve thought the same thing, or maybe you are a missionary right now in a place outside your birth country. I’m writing this as an American to fellow Americans, but hopefully those of you in other countries will benefit as well.

We are living in a time that’s unfamiliar. It’s nerve-wracking, uncomfortable, strange, and sometimes plain ol’ scary. We’ve gone from normal to not-normal pretty quick, and if you haven’t come to grips with this yet I’ll be the one to tell you: it isn’t going back to normal. Because God is always Lord, not going back to normal will be okay. But it has been and will be quite an adjustment.

Look around, what do you see?

Fear? Panic? Lust for evil? Addiction? Injustice? Hatred, betrayal, anxiety?

This year, the great 2020, people have been pushed to limits and stretched out far. When we are pressed, what’s deep inside is that which comes out. If people don’t have Jesus, the fruit of the Spirit is not what comes out!

As we wonder what things will look like in our country, and as we see what is unfolding, I want to encourage you.

The balm for all of this is not our government. The government has a role, but it is not savior. Jesus Christ is Savior, and the balm that we all need.

So while we fight for good politics and leaders, we also need to realize that people desperately need Jesus. We are missionaries - here, right now.

I believe we will have more opportunities to share our hope than we’ve had before. It is very evident now who is truly at peace and who is not. What’s the reason for your peace? How can you have hope and purpose as the world is falling apart?

We have a Savior who strengthens us through even the hardest challenges. We can feel the panic and shed the tears, but we can continue on knowing that we are safe in Christ. We can do our daily duties knowing that they are worthwhile to the King of kings and Lord of lords.

But as for you, speak the things which are proper for sound doctrine: that the older men be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience; the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things — that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed (Titus 2:1-5).

This exhortation doesn’t change with the times! Are you an older woman? Hopefully you know how this section applies to your life, and if I may say - we younger women need you to follow this! We desperately need Godly women in our lives, and we need you to take your role seriously. Reach out, invite us over, offer to stop by with coffee and chat. Many of us want to learn and have Godly examples. Encourage us with your testimonies of God’s faithfulness in your life!

Are you a younger woman, like me? Let’s not push the older women away or roll our eyes at their suggestions and stories. Let’s invite them in where appropriate, and learn to appreciate their wisdom and God-given role in our lives. Along with this, we are given the rest of that passage; love our husbands and children, be self-controlled and pure (ESV), homemakers, kind and submissive to our husbands. This is where our faithfulness and duty to the Lord starts: with our families. With the world around us fraying at the seams, it is ever more clearly important that we serve wholeheartedly in our homes. Our days of prepping meals, teaching math, doing laundry, and listening to our husband’s challenges are not in vain, they are faithful service. They truly are beautiful deeds if done for the Lord.

And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is a disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward (Matthew 10:42).

How many drinks do you hand out during the day?! We know God loves a cheerful giver (2 Cor. 9:7) and one who gives freely without expecting anything in return. When you pass out drinks and plates of food, do it cheerfully and with thanksgiving! The Lord has given you opportunities today to serve on His behalf.

Beyond the walls of our own homes, we have friends and family and neighbors who desperately need the goodness of the Lord. They need to know that all of us have fallen short of God’s standards, and we need a Savior. We need a Savior to rescue us from our bondage to sin - and those of us who believe in Jesus Christ as Lord know that He is the most wonderful, gracious, complete Savior!

Here is our chance, friends. Talk with your neighbors and get to know them. Let the neighborhood kids come play in your yard, and pass out cups of water to them too. Bake goodies with your kids and deliver them to elderly men and women, or to families who haven’t left their houses in weeks. We don’t all have to be on the same page politically to be able to serve and show Christ’s love. Let others see the freedom you have in Christ, and that they can have it too.

Invite people over for meals with no strings attached. Help with someone’s yard work, and do it joyfully. Call relatives you haven’t seen for a while, just to chat.

Yes, it’s work. But we are called to reach out on behalf of Christ, and it is good work! It is sanctifying work, work that makes us more like Jesus and blesses others at the same time. It is living out the Gospel, and it is rough and messy and absolutely beautiful. Don’t be afraid to spend your life for the sake of the Gospel. In fact, do it!

In this trying time, may we cling more to the Word of God and be people who do what it says. Now is the time for us to be missionaries, right where we are and with increased fervor.

I am praying for you, reader, as we go at this together!