God's Goodness in Miscarriage

Your promise still stands

Great is Your faithfulness, faithfulness

I'm still in Your hands

This is my confidence, You've never failed me yet

I know the night won't last

Your Word will come to pass

My heart will sing Your praise again

Jesus, You're still enough

Keep me within Your love

My heart will sing Your praise again

The song started, and I knew I wasn’t going to be able to keep it together. “You have never failed me yet…” I started to cry, I could barely believe the words that were being sung - let alone sing them myself.

I left the sanctuary, ran into the parents’ room, and found two tiny babies playing with their moms. I couldn’t stay there. I left the room and stood at the door. God wanted me to worship. Even if I wasn’t singing, I needed to hear these words.

Just two days prior to this Sunday service, I had been in the hospital for a Dilation and Curettage. I had miscarried at 16 weeks. We unexpectedly went to my OB earlier in the week to see the dark ultrasound, the spot where the baby’s heart was no longer beating.  

I felt failed by God. My womb that had been filled with joy and life was now empty, and so was I. Sadly, I had already been in this place before. In between the births of my two sons, I had also experienced a late-term miscarriage.

Loss is nearly impossible to understand. Feelings of shame, regret, fear, anger, and guilt are all normal. If you’re in the midst of this, let yourself feel these emotions. Rely on God to reveal Himself in the midst of it all.

Most verses of comfort I would seek also made me angry. Like James 1:17, which says, “Everything good comes from God.” How is this GOOD? It is really hard to process through verses like this, but that’s just it; it is a part of the process, and that is GOOD.

This verse popped up on my Instagram feed several days after my loss while working on this article. God clearly spoke to me, not something I have personally experienced too often.

He reminded me that losing a child is not good, but He is good. He does not promise me a life without struggles, but He promises me a life where He will see me through these trials, and that IS good. Glorifying him through this loss is GOOD. I will see my angel babies again, and that is GOOD.  

1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

For me, good looks like being open with my losses - speaking at moms’ groups, sharing my story in this article. Talking with a nursing friend who wants to support grieving moms in the hospital setting. Having compassion and understanding for loss, that I wouldn’t have without the experience of loss myself. This is GOOD. God is in this. He is GOOD.

Find the good, whatever that looks like for you, and give thanks to God for it.

The song continues:

My heart will sing Your praise again

Jesus, You’re still enough

Keep me within Your love

My heart will sing Your praise again

The day after that Sunday service, this song played on repeat for me. I sang God’s praises again. He loves me, He loves you, and He loves our children.

Written by Becca Bergman. Used with permission.

Song quoted is “Do It Again” by Elevation Worship.

How to Create a Family Mission Statement

Are you are wanting to become more intentional with your family, but you’re not sure what that looks like? Start by creating a family mission statement.

A mission statement may seem too corporate for you, but hear me out. It will really get your whole family on the same page. The family mission statement gives you a chance to prioritize what your family is all about.

Companies, clubs, businesses and pretty much every organization has a set of core values that they refer to when they need redirection. Shouldn’t we decide what our families core values are so we can refer back to them? As parents, we are the CEO’s of our homes.

I want my kids to know and understand what our family stands for. The family mission statement becomes your families identity; their DNA.

So how do you create your own family mission statement?

How to Create a Family Mission Statement:

ONE

List Core Values

Create your family’s core values with your spouse, and if your kids are older, have them contribute too. You could make this a family meeting. This list should not be created by just one person in the family. Collaboration is key. Here are some examples of values you could use: generous, caring, loving, etc.

In my family, my husband and prayed and brainstormed what we wanted our family to look like (our kids are too young to contribute to the conversation). We started by writing Riches are… and then jotted down our values. We wanted a list that was short and easy to remember.

Spending this time with my spouse really connected us and helped us be on the same page with our parenting. If your spouse isn’t on board, you can make this less formal by asking what they want your kids to be like when they are older.

TWO

Rank the Values

Now that you have a good list of family values, decide which values are most important to your family. You can number or star them or whatever method you would like. We tried limiting our core values so it would be easier to remember and less overwhelming. Try to limit your list to ten or less. Talk with your spouse about this and your kids (if they are old enough).

When deciding what to cut and keep, consider what your kids need to work on. If one of your kids are struggling with lying, add in honesty or truthful. That way when your child lies, you can say _(your last name)_ are honest. You can then use the mission statement to reinforce the good qualities you want your kids to possess. You can always adapt your mission statement later on, so don’t let that deter you from writing your mission statement.

THREE

Put the Mission Statement Together

You are at the point of writing your mission statement. Try to get to the point, and not be too wordy. Make the mission statement work for you. The easiest way to start is by writing your last name are… and list your values in whatever order you want. You can write your mission statement by putting the most important values first. Be creative here and make your mission statement fit your family’s personality.

FOUR

Display your Mission Statement

A family mission statement doesn’t do much good if it is written and left in a notebook. This is the most important step! Don’t skip it! Make your family mission statement really impactful, by displaying it in your home.

We typed our mission statement up, printed it numerous times, and framed it. I bought small black frames from the dollar store to display it. Our framed mission statement is throughout our house. We have our family mission statement on display in our hallway, kitchen, kid’s bathroom, and dining room.

If you are needing some ideas on ways to display your family mission statement, here are a few…

• paint it on a canvas or wood board

• use a program like Illustrator or PhotoShop to customize your own

• type it out on a Word or Pages Doc and print off

• use colored paper/ink

• make it your phone’s background

• make it your computer’s background

The more we see our family mission statement, the greater the impact it will have. What our families stand for is so important. Go create your families mission statement. We are in this together. Let’s be intentional in raising our children - the future generation.

Originally written by Amberlee Rich. Used with permission.

Mom Anger + 3 Ways to Surrender

If you’re a woman then you’re a human and you’re going to make mistakes. Your kids and your husband will frustrate you to the moon and back and you’re going to get angry, cranky and irritated sometimes, it goes with the territory. We live in a fallen world with fallen natures and it takes everything in us to submit to the God who can conquer the sin reigning deep within.

I struggle with anger. Mostly because I have a way in my head I think everything should be. When it doesn’t look the way I want it to, I snap.

I answer harshly.

I get impatient.

I want to control my life and I want it to be a certain way–my way–which is rarely the way.

I’m selfish and I think I have rights but if we are truly following Christ, we give up our rights. We tell the Lord with all sincerity, “I surrender all” until we don’t and the ugly rears it’s head. I’m slowly learning how to truly surrender–my ways, my wants, my worship, my time, my fuse, my control, my everything–to the one who alone can change me from the inside out.

We can stress over our kids being kids, silly and sometimes highly annoying and disobedient and (especially if you have boys) way too loud! Or, we can thank God He gave us the great honor of raising our children, building them into the men and women of God He’s calling them to be.

Moms are builders. It takes time to build a life, years my friend. We do the same endless tasks over and over, teach the same lessons, correct the same behavior, pray the same prayers. And we see those tiny increments of hours and days turn into months and years, because it takes a long time to build children into the men and women of God He’s called them to be, the next generation who will change the world. The ones who will be willing to extend His hands and His feet to the lost, the desperate, the depressed, the weary, the wanderers, no matter where He leads them.

I learned three important strategies that helped to change how I viewed my role as a mother when I was in the thick of it. I believe they’ll help you too:

Pray whenever you can. In the carpool line, making lunches in the morning, folding endless loads of laundry, whenever. You don’t have to rise at dawn and have the perfect atmosphere, beautiful music and a lit candle to worship God. He knows. Do it whenever you can but do it…because wherever you do it, He’s there.

Cultivate a heart of thankfulness. When you really begin to thank Him for the lives He’s entrusted to you, you’ll view them differently. It’s a long process this parenting thing. But just like a building grows one brick and one story at a time, raising a child is one day, one month, one year at a time. It’s the day-in, day-out drudgery that can get to you if you let it. No one promises fame and fortune for being a mom. We do what we do in obscurity and hope eventually it will pay off. And if Love is leading you, it will. You’ll see destiny come forth and the children you raise will change the world.

Ask for forgiveness when you snap in anger. Kids deserve respect too and when we humble ourselves, repent and ask them to forgive us it models Godly behavior. Sin is sin, no matter how old you are.

The way you love is the way you’ll live. If you really do love the Lord with all your heart, mind, soul and strength then His love will flow out of you naturally. Not perfectly mama, but naturally.

Because guess what–you’ll never be perfect and, neither will I!

Written for Strength & Song by Kate Battistelli.

Kate is the author of Growing Great Kids -Partner with God to Cultivate His Purpose in Your Child’s Life, published by Charisma House. Her newest book, The God Dare, published by Barbour Books, will release in 2019. She’s mom to GRAMMY award-winning artist Francesca Battistelli and Mimi to her 4 children. She’s been married to her best friend Mike for 35 years and lives just outside of Nashville. Kate loves to cook and blogs about food and faith at www.KateBattistelli.com. You can follow her on Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter, and Facebook.

Transform Your Motherhood Through Prayer Journaling

I struggled with reading my Bible and praying for my kids consistently until I started prayer journaling.

The excuses kept piling up in my mind.  I was too busy with all the motherhood duties and if I’m honest, I didn’t want to wake up early to do it either. I wasn’t making devotion time and prayer a priority even though, I wanted it to be.  

My intention was to pray specifics for my children, for their future spouses, for their future and so much more, but I struggled with making it happen. My prayer life for my children drastically changed after I read the book “Praying Circles around Your Children” by Matt Batterson.

Matt Batterson talks about how specific prayers prayed for us by our parents, grandparents, relatives, etc. has brought us to where we are today. This book convicted me to become more intentional in my prayer life and gave me practical ideas to pray consistently for my kids.

My biggest takeaway from “Praying Circles around Your Children” was to journal prayers in a Bible specifically for each child. This Bible will eventually be a graduation gift or a wedding gift for my children. I absolutely LOVE this idea. I had no idea that this could literally change my personal walk with God and help me be a better parent.

When I start my mornings reading the Bible and praying for my kids, I find that I treat them better. I am kinder and more understanding.

Grounding myself in God’s Word and praying through the Bible changes my mindset. My day goes so much better. I can’t recommend prayer journaling enough.

This is how I journal for my kids. You can adapt this to fit your lifestyle.

Prayer Journaling in 5 Easy Steps

ONE

Buy a Journaling Bible

I bought a journaling Bible for each of my kids. If you have several kids, don’t be overwhelmed by needing to fill multiple Bibles. You will get to it and it will give you more of an incentive to be consistently reading and writing in the Bible.

There are so many different journaling Bibles to choose from. I prefer the single column journaling Bibles instead of the lines being on the bottom of the page. I like that my prayers line up with the chapter I am reading.

Choose a durable Bible cover like leather or a hardcover so it will last. If you have multiple kids, choose different designed Bibles to make it more personal for them and less confusing for you.

Don’t forget to choose a translation that you will want to be reading for years. I chose the ESV (English Standard Version) because I really enjoy it.

TWO

Ask God What Book(s) of the Bible to Read

Once you have the Bible, it is time to start. Choose which child’s Bible you would like to start with. I pray and ask God what book of the Bible I should read for that particular child.

I usually read and journal in my child’s Bible for about a month or two and then switch.  I read at least one book of the Bible or multiple shorter books and then I switch to my other child’s Bible.  My goal is to read the entirety of each of my kid’s Bibles before they graduate or get married.

THREE

Date Each Prayer Entry

I start by writing the date in the Bible. By simply adding the date, I have become more accountable and consistent in reading my Bible.  I don’t want my kids to see that I read a chapter and then read the next chapter a few weeks later.

This is a keepsake, so I like to add important events like a birthdays, deaths, etc. I normally write something about that before I start reading the passage.

FOUR

Underline What Jumps out at You

After I date the journal entry in my Bible, I then read one to two chapters a day. You could read whatever amount you would like.

I underline anything that stands out to me as I go. What you underline will be referred to when writing out the prayer. 

FIVE

Write out the Prayer 

I then write a prayer praying out the Bible verses I read for my child. I refer back to what I underlined. By doing this, I am praying specifics I would have never prayed normally for my kids.

To give you an example, when I was reading Ruth I was praying that my daughter would have a great relationship with her future mother-in-law. I would have never thought to pray for my 3-year-old daughter’s future mother-in-law. That is what is so amazing about this journaling process.

I can’t tell you enough how beneficial this prayer journaling has been for me spiritually and as a mother. I want to be a woman of prayer and I want my kids to see me reading my Bible. I want to lead them by example. This process accomplishes both of those desires.

Each of the Bible’s I have for my kids is truly precious. They are some of my most valued belongings. I love this prayer journaling concept. I would like to eventually have a journaling Bible for my husband. How different would a marriage be if you prayed every morning for your husband!! I also want to continue this tradition with my future grandchildren.

If you are struggling with being consistent in your prayer life and reading the Bible, try this. Prayer journaling can be transformational for your kids and you.

Originally written and posted by Amberlee Rich. Used with permission.