I'm a planner. I like to know what's coming and when, so I can prepare myself as much as possible.
It worked out, sort of, with my first son, as he was a c-section. It was a last-minute breach that meant I had to throw out my vision for how the birth would go; but it was quick and simple and there he was.
Almost two weeks ago I started pre-labor with my second son, and just when I thought the contractions would warrant a hospital trip they stopped and everything was calm. Day after day after day for a week until finally the pain was so bad I determined to go in and stay till the baby came. He came 8 hours later.
I had texted a friend -- got any Scripture you clung to during your deliveries? She sent back a few, including the one that I latched on to:
"You will keep him in perfect peace,
Whose mind is stayed on You,
Because he trusts in You.
Trust in the Lord forever,
For in YAH, the Lord, is everlasting strength."
I focused on it; perfect peace, He'd keep me in perfect peace as I trusted Him with all the unknowns. There were so many unknowns.
Our littlest arrived and I thought about the verse again, thankful for the promise of peace.
The days kept coming and going afterward in a blur; I'm still not sure what day today is. Somewhere between chasing an almost-2-year old and power napping through the night with an infant my Bible sat on top of our hutch untouched. I longed to read it but hadn't caught my breath long enough to do so.
All I wanted last night was to climb into bed once the baby was asleep and pass out myself. But wouldn't you know, he wasn't really asleep so up we were to feed again.
I wanted to cry. Overwhelmed and exhausted and trapped being the only one to meet all the needs. I grabbed my Bible anyways and opened it up, right back to Isaiah. This time something else hit me:
"For in YAH, the Lord, is everlasting strength."
If there's anyone who needs everlasting strength, it's a mom. I need it. And there's only one source for that strength -- our Lord. He alone can provide it, and if we trust in Him to do so He will.
It doesn't mean the needs disappear or even minimize; it doesn't mean we get full nights of sleep or clarity to cook nice meals or time during the day to get all the chores done.
But it does mean that we look back and see that we made it through. We had what we needed when we needed it, and we can trust that record for the moments and days to come.
Take a breath, mamas. Trust in the One who can give you everlasting strength.
Written by Amy Parsons